I really don't know if I should even post about this, but to me.. this is just kind of extremely funny to me now because I'm not like this anymore even though it's still pretty fucked up.

So, I don't know 2 years ago? Maybe even more than that, I'm not sure how old Ryan's daughter is... I some how met this guy Ryan. This may have been 3 years ago? I'm so screwed up with time, but let's just say this was awhile ago, while I was still in reckless mode and didn't really care about fucking up people's lives. And well, I met this guy Ryan. And instantly just fell for him. And honestly I'm not sure why because looking back on it I probably should have stayed away, but I was just really drawn to him. At the time he was engaged to this girl. I'm not sure if at the time she was pregnant or not, but needless to say at some point during this, I found out she was carrying his kid. He was completely unsatisfied in the relationship and we starting hanging out and what not and eventually we really fell for each other. So all while he was engaged to this girl, he was running around with me. I'm not sure what happened, but I ditched out for awhile. And I still talked to him once and awhile. For a year or two we would still even tell each other that we loved each other and eventually him and that girl weren't together anymore and he didn't really say why. And he would always try to get things back together all the time, but I eventually just wasn't interested in actually pursuing things seriously.

So pretty much, I just screwed around with some engaged dude with a kid on the way 2-3 years ago because I was a stupid fucking girl who loved to fuck shit up and yeah. I just didn't give a fuck and I was... stupid. Well, I haven't talked to this kid since I don't know.. it's been months believe me. And I joined this site InkedNation and I came across this girl who looked kind of familiar or atleast her default photo, but her profile was private. So I send this girl a friend request.

And guess what I got while I was sleeping? A nice little message from this girl I thought I knew who ended up being Ryan's baby momma. Saying that I had some fucking nerve and hoped I had fun with Ryan last night.

To me, that part is funny. I haven't spoken to that guy, in awhile. Nor have I physically seen him in maybe even a year? Not that he didn't try to, but... still. Like it's fucked up and I didn't even know she knew who I was... so oof!

On another note, I texted Kevin last night (yes after all that shitty messaging) and asked him if we could "fuck" LOL and he simply replied "Nah"... oh well. Hahahahah I need sleeeeeeep I feel like a god damn zombie.